Two of a kind

Having lived with a mother-daughter duo of Sagittarians, life is one big stage, and everyday is new drama for sure. There is never want for entertainment, the two are capable of creating mountains out of molehills, spinning a veritable yarn of imaginary tales from simple day to day happenings and shifting gears from the heights of joviality to the depths of depression all in one day. I talk about my mother and my sister. If you're looking to be entertained without paying for expensive cable channels, get yourself not one but a pair of Sagittarians in the house, you'll get ample returns on the investment :D.

If ever I caught Seren with an evil grin on her face, then it was undoubtedly THE time for playing a prank on Amma. Her devilishly smug face displayed her pride at having devised the whole plot. The earliest one that I can remember is one evening when she returned from school and rang the doorbell. As my mother opened the door, she sweetly smiles at my mother as she continues to chew on something in her mouth that appears seemingly full. While she sneaks a wink at me, she says "Hmmmm, ma, this tastes pretty good" and points to a mat on the porch outside where my mother has placed balls of boric acid(roach treatment) to dry out in the sun!

I swear to God, my mother's face not only changed multiple shades of purple with fear, her body froze into sheer fit of immobility. Its got to have been utter maternal instincts that must have stopped her from strangling my sister that day.

And this is just one of the many pranks that Seren has played on Amma. And she still continues to do so. One other entertaining skill of hers is that she can imitate Amma very well. Be it the way Amma admonishes us or the way she narrates an incident to Amma's little quirks and idiosyncracies- you bet, Seren can have you in splits.

If you ever doubt that Sagittarians have a vivid imagination, rest assured they do. If one were to ask Amma why she always gets startled when woken up, her deductive reasoning is that it must've been because as a child she remembers being locked up in a dark room and dozing off in there. There is no factual evidence to prove this theory, my grandmother certainly doesnt recall any such.

Always and I say always, Amma will have some errand when she notices either one of us(Appa, Seren or I) stepping out of the house(it doesnt apply to the times we would be leaving for work or college or school). I have always doubted if she has some kind of sensor that lets her know when we are stepping outside for anything else. "Seren, can you get me a packet , it should say Hot Iyengar's you know!"

Seren(trying hard to resist chewing her tongue out) "So you want a HOT Iyengar?"

Amma "Pah, Hot Iyengar's puliyogare silly. What else could be Hot Iyengar's?"

Seren(mumble, mumble) "Alright, whatever!"

Make no mistake, there are times when they are at each others' throats, constantly getting on each others' nerves and cold wars galore. And then there are times the two will team up to play pranks on poor, unsuspecting Appa. So the two have already bought three tickets for Chennai.

Amma "Seren and I have booked tickets to go to Chennai next weekend. Did you want to go as well?"

Appa "Oh! Well I really didnt want to. But if you two are, sure."

Seren " Appa, I checked, there are no more tickets by train. Why dont you come by bus and meet us there?"

Paavam Appa "Sure, let me go buy bus tickets".

While he starts planning to get the cash needed and go buy the bus ticket, the two will sheepishly sneak up on him and say "Ta-da! We got your ticket already!"

Yes, this is the kind of drama that unfolds in our house at regular intervals.

Some years ago, we got our parents each a cellphone. For emergency purposes. Because you see my dad had the habit of going out and never telling us where he was going or when he'd be back. So when it got late, there have been many nights, the three of us have sat out in the porch waiting for him to return. Though this solution came quite late in the day, we believed this was a perfect way for us to call and ask for his coordinates even if he didnt share them with us. Its been a few years and both of them have mastered the use of this handy tool and are proud owners. But one of the weirdest outcomes has been, Appa calls us when he's 2 traffic signals away from the house to let us know he's 2 traffic signals away and will be home in 10 mins!!!!!!!!!! Sigh!

“I may not lead the most dramatic life, but in my brain it's War and Peace everyday.”
~Rufus Wainwright


Edited to add : After much thought, this one gem just cannot be left out. Appa hates wastage. Specially when it comes to food. And he loves eating out. Amma and wastage go hand in hand. Yes, horoscope matching's biggest success story, these two. When we go out to eat and get ourselves thaalis, this is what happens. After about 15 mins, when all of us seemingly are digging away into the multiple katoris of delightful north indian or south indian fare, one will espy Amma with a guilt ridden smug face sitting in front of a thaali with inverted katoris. It means she has hastily pecked on every item, finished her meal, and hastily stuffed ALL the remnants into each katori, INVERTED. Guileless Appa thinks she has emptied her plate.

Scorecard : Amma 1, Appa 0.